ethel’s words

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THERE ARE SEVEN DIRTY WORDS

I needed to know the seven dirty words the Federal Communications Commission prohibits on the airwaves. But I dare not write the words--I would run afoul of the law and I don’t have the authority, as the government does, to write dirty words.

I could write analogues for some: urinate, defecate, fornicate, mother-raper, genitalia female, genitalia male, and ???? What is the seventh?

In the halls of Congress, or in the office of The Federal Communications Commission, you can say some words you cannot say publicly. Lawmakers must discuss laws; if you are Jake Garn or Dick Cheney, say what you wish in government edifices.

If your ancestry is Anglo-Saxon, you could protest that those words are merely your language, but then, what could you do to relieve your anger?

Ethel C. Hale